Help, My Son Is Smoking Pot!
We received the following anonymous question today: "Help!! When I got home from work I found my tween son smoking pot with one of his friends. I talked to him about the dangers, and how it inhibits brain growth, the legal ramifications, etc., but I'm wondering if there's anyone else out there who's gone through this and has been successful at stopping it."
My guess is that many of you parents have dealt with something like this at one time or another, and have had varying degrees of success. I applaud this parent for using this as an opportunity to have a discussion with her son about her concerns, and to not just react by punishing him. I would suggest that rather than having a one time conversation it's important to pursue this to get a better handle on what's going on with him. Experimentation is common, but if this is something he's doing on an ongoing basis they'll need professional help to intervene.
Given that he may not be totally honest in what he tells her, this is also a time to look objectively at his behavior. Has his mood changed recently, has his academic performance declined, and has he lost interest in other things or friends in his life. These may all be indications of a more serious problem. I think what's important is that she's giving him a clear message that this is something that she's concerned about, and that it's not acceptable to her.
Finally, there's the sticky issue of the friend. Should she notify his parents, and what should she say to them? My experience has been that if I put myself in the other parent's position I realize that if it were my child caught using drugs I would want to know.
These are my immediate thoughts, but I think it would be helpful to hear from other parents who have gone through this. What worked, what didn't, and what would you do differently?
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